If you can answer this, planning your life will be much easier. But even if you can't, you probably have some idea about what you want.
Maybe what you care about most is love. Or maybe it's respect. Or security. Or freedom. Or excitement. Or a sense of control over your life.
It's more important to think about the total quality of your life than just about specific career or competitive goals because when you do, you'll focus on what's really important to you.
Can Sports Help You Accomplish Personal Goals?
Definitely. But the happiest athletes are often those who look beyond winning. They can appreciate sports as a lifestyle and an opportunity:
In 1992 he did earn a spot on the team and competed in the Barcelona Olympics.
She went on to become the supervisor of physical fitness for the Chicago Department of Health, president of the Central Association of the Amateur Athletic Union, a consultant to the President's Council on Physical Fitness, and a member of the President's Commission on Olympic Sports. She now runs an organization to encourage inner city girls to participate in sports.
"Every place I've gone, I've met people and made friends. I've seen history unfold, seen a perspective you don't get back home. To be standing with the Romanian team when Ceausecu is overthrown. To be with East and West Germans when the Berlin Wall comes down... I just wanted to do something different." (4)
Do Some Athletes Confuse Competitive Goals with Personal Ones?
Too many people mistakenly believe that all their problems will be solved when they make lots of money or become famous or win major competitions.
But life doesn't work like that. It's much better to first decide how you want to feel and then work backward from this image to find out the best way to get it.
However, if you don't really know what you are searching for, it's easy to get confused about your motives. This is a problem because motivation is so important to an athlete. To be your best, you have to know WHY you want to win, or even IF you want to win.
Examples:
As a tennis player, he was in the U.S. Open Junior Championships at 13 and was on the Junior Davis Cup Team at 17.
In basketball he set the North Carolina high school career scoring record. (He was also class valedictorian.)
In his last two years of college he was an All-American in both tennis and basketball. He was the top NBA draft pick in 1976. But his success was accompanied by alcohol and drug abuse. "I kept asking what was next. I'd grown up so fast in athletics that when I got to the professional ranks, I ran out of goals. Being the No. 1 draft pick made me ask: 'Where do I go from here?'" (8)
Lucas got treatment for his abuse problems in 1986, retired from the NBA in 1990, and established The John Lucas Aftercare Treatment and Recovery Center to treat substance abusers. In 1992 he purchased a minor league basketball team, coached it to the championship of the United States Basketball League, and then became head coach of the San Antonio Spurs and then head coach of the Philadelphia 76ers.
In 1995 he decided to return to diving in an effort to earn a spot on the 1996 U.S. Olympic team. In March 1996 he set an unofficial world scoring record for the 3-meter springboard; in April he won the 1996 U. S. Indoor Championships.
He went on to win the bronze medal at the 1996 Atlanta Olympics.
Lucas and Lenzi aren't the only ones who have confused sports goals with personal goals. Many athletes have not separated their motivation to succeed in sports with their hopes for a fulfilling life.
1. Some athletes pursue sports careers because they think they enjoy training and competing, but what they really want is love and attention from their parents. As children they learned that the best way to please their parents was to win. Example:
His father died unexpectedly of a heart attack in January 1995. When Swartz was unable to capture his third Olympic Festival title in July 1995, he said, "I know I didn't impress my dad today. The hardest thing for me is I didn't do my dad proud because I didn't win this fight. I don't want to waste the last 15 years of my father's life." (10)
Even after he turned pro in 1996, Swartz felt the pressure to perform for others. When he returned home to Fort Collins, Colorado for a match he said, "I haven't boxed in Fort Collins in six or eight years. There's pressure to please my family and friends." (11)
At some point in their careers some of these athletes realize they have been competing for the wrong reasons and decide to quit. Example:
In April 1989 he quit football to go to medical school, something he had wanted to do since ninth grade. "I can't want to play only for the money. There has to be passion." (12)
In 1993, when he was a second year resident, he said, "I left a really wonderful, glamorous career. But I sort of realized there was a deeper side to life than just catching passes, filling up a stadium." (13)
2. Some athletes pursue sports as a way to win and keep friends. Many children learn quickly that sports can make you popular. Example:
Football running back Reggie Rivers, who played for the Denver Broncos, said that for many athletes, sports "becomes a magic wand of social power. It earns [the athlete] invitations to parties, deferential treatment from peers and dates with pretty girls." (15)
But this tactic often fails to satisfy their emotional needs because it attracts the wrong kinds of people to them--the sort who only care about them as athletes. This often results in superficial friendships and relationships. Example:
Then Ehrman's younger brother died of cancer. Looking for something more than just football, Ehrman began attending seminary during his off-seasons. When he retired as a pro, he became a full-time minister, serving the urban poor in Baltimore. (16)
Leigh Steinberg, an agent who has handled many top football players, had this to say on the subject: "The problem that the athlete has is that he's surrounded by externals--adulation, newspaper clippings, money, people who like him because he's an athlete--all of which fade when his career is over. If he hasn't built a strong sense of self-respect, settled in a community where he's cared for and cares for other people, and come to understand that those values will transcend a short football, baseball or basketball career, then he's in for a rude awakening when he leaves sports." (17)
3. Some athletes enjoy sports, but discover they don't want the pressures that accompany professional careers. These athletes mistakenly assume that what attracted them to sports as children will be present when they are adults. Example:
Washington is now back at Syracuse to finish his degree while working as a youth basketball coach for the City of Syracuse Parks and Recreation Department and doing color commentary on radio and television for the school's men's and women's basketball teams.
He had a brain tumor removed in 1995, an event which changed his outlook on life. "God has given me another chance. I'm excited about it. I'm taking full advantage of everything. Life is not promised to you every day." (19)
An excellent book to help you sort out personal goals is Wishcraft: How to Get What You Really Want by Barbara Sher, with Annie Gottlieb. It helps you to first define what you want and then to determine the best way to get it.
What makes this book so useful is that it shows you that through creativity, flexibility, and unconventional approaches to your challenges, you can find ways to achieve more than you thought possible.